{"id":98887765,"date":"2017-01-04T14:28:25","date_gmt":"2017-01-04T19:28:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.onetravel.com\/going-places\/?p=98887765"},"modified":"2021-07-20T07:46:56","modified_gmt":"2021-07-20T11:46:56","slug":"real-moms-reveal-why-its-so-hard-to-travel-and-why-you-should-go-anyway","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.onetravel.com\/going-places\/real-moms-reveal-why-its-so-hard-to-travel-and-why-you-should-go-anyway\/","title":{"rendered":"Why It\u2019s So Hard to Travel as a Mom (And Why You Should Anyway)"},"content":{"rendered":"

In a poem to her child, Anne Campbell wrote: <\/span>You are the trip I did not take, you are the pearls I could not buy\u00a0<\/span><\/i>\/ <\/span>you are my blue Italian lake, you are my piece of foreign sky<\/span><\/i>.<\/span><\/i> Before I became a mother I thought it was a beautiful sentiment. Now, knee-deep in the trenches of motherhood, I\u2019ve decided that I hate it. Let me explain.<\/span><\/p>\n

Prior to becoming a mom, I backpacked through Europe, camped in Peru and road-tripped through the Southwest. And I had this idea that a child wouldn\u2019t change things. \u201cI\u2019ll just bring them along,\u201d I thought, \u201cor leave them with family.\u201d But weeks (maybe even days) into motherhood, I began to wonder if I would ever go anywhere again. Was this screaming child my blue Italian lake<\/em>? I decided that there was no way moms could travel at this point. Definitely not sane moms and for sure not moms with multiple kids.<\/p>\n

\"mother-and-two-children-look-at-the-sea\"<\/p>\n

It turns out, that I was right. Well, not entirely, but partially. Mom\u2019s do travel less. A lot less. According to a Devries Global<\/span>\u00a0survey <\/span><\/a>published way back in 2014, women without children traveled an average of 16 days domestically during that year, while women with children traveled 10. And internationally the numbers are even lower. Women without children traveled 10 days internationally while women with children traveled only 3.<\/span><\/p>\n

Obviously, moms travel less. Of course, there are various factors that come into play, but in the end, it\u2019s because of the kids. It\u2019s hard to take them with you and it\u2019s hard to leave them at home.<\/p>\n

In order to understand how to fit my traveling life in with motherhood, I spoke to a tribe of moms all of whom have made travel happen (even internationally!) with multiple, young children.<\/p>\n

Why Moms Feel Like They Can\u2019t Travel<\/h2>\n

\"mother-with-3-kids-on-a-plane\"<\/p>\n

\u201cThe anxiety is crippling,\u201d says Christine Partridge, a high school soccer coach and mother of one. \u201cEverything I want to do I think of worst case scenarios with a baby. I love cruises and have been dying to go on one again but can\u2019t shake the fear that my child will fall off the boat. We took a trip to Europe recently and I was super scared of a kidnapping scenario.\u201d<\/p>\n

Christine isn\u2019t alone. Multiple women told me that their fear of \u201cWhat if?\u201d prevented them from booking flights<\/a> to begin with. \u201cI\u2019m just worried that my kid will have a huge plane freak out and cry the entire time and I\u2019ll feel so bad because all of these people paid so much money,\u201d says Eliza Kent a nurse and mother of two.<\/p>\n

And leaving the kids at home isn\u2019t much easier. Most of the moms I spoke to said that they feel more anxiety leaving them than they would taking them. \u201cI stared at the clock my first trip without my baby the entire time,\u201d says mom of two and physician Kayla Whiting. \u201cI would say, \u2018Oh it\u2019s 10 am, my baby should be going down for his morning nap now.\u2019 It took everything in me not to text my mother-in-law who was watching him and ask how much he was eating and how long he slept.\u201d<\/p>\n

While anxiety was the main reason most of the moms I spoke said they weren\u2019t comfortable traveling with kids, the financial toll was right up there too. Most airlines require that children over the age of 2 purchase their own seat, which is the same cost as the adult fare. Even with one child that can be a burden, but add multiple kids and suddenly flying becomes a tremendous expense.<\/p>\n

Bring the Kids Along vs. Leave Them at Home<\/h2>\n

\"family-making-sandcastles-on-the-beach\"<\/p>\n

So the options for parents are:<\/p>\n

A. Bring the kids<\/span><\/p>\n

B. Leave them at home<\/span><\/p>\n

C. Don\u2019t go anywhere<\/span><\/p>\n

Since I\u2019m a believer in travel, I decided that C is not actually an option. So for those parents who want or need to travel, there are two camps: Camp Bring the Kids, and Camp Leave the Kids. Each option has its own difficulties. But most moms I spoke to agreed that they prefer to bring the kids whenever possible – especially if the travel is for pleasure.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve done both, and in the end, it\u2019s easier to just bring the kids,\u201d says Kayla Whiting. \u201cWe don\u2019t live near family so getting them to a grandparent or aunt is time-consuming and expensive and cuts into our vacation time.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

And if you\u2019re on the fence about taking the kids because you\u2019re worried about how they will behave, consider the wise words of musician and mom of three, Lacey Williams:<\/span><\/p>\n

[perfectpullquote align=”full” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]\u201cWhat\u2019s the worst that\u2019s going to happen? Your baby will cry? Your kid will run up and down the aisles of the plane? Babies cry. Kids whine. That happens at home and on fantastic vacations. So go, and be somewhere awesome while your baby cries and your kids whine.\u201d[\/perfectpullquote]<\/p>\n

But business travel or an adults-only wedding may require someone to watch the kids. Not to mention, there are some trips that cannot be taken with children from a practical perspective.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cSometimes I worry that if I don\u2019t travel now, I never will,\u201d Christine Partridge told me. \u201cI only have one child and I think I want more. I don\u2019t want to wait until my kids are grown up to see the world. Since I have anxiety about what could happen if I bring my daughter, \u00a0it\u2019s easier for me to leave her with my mom.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

And while it may not be in the child\u2019s best interest for parents to be jetting off every other weekend to a new destination, most moms agreed that leaving the kids with family for a much-needed getaway can actually be a good thing for both of them. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cWhen we go on vacation I miss my kids like crazy. But it\u2019s always nice for me to get home and realize that they missed me too,\u201d said mom of three and landscape architect Katie Allenbach. <\/span><\/p>\n

How Moms Can Make it Easier to Take the Kids<\/h2>\n

<\/b>Traveling with your children can be a rewarding experience if planned for in advance. \u201cThere\u2019s more to traveling with kids than the flight,\u201d said Eliza. \u201cThere\u2019s also driving, sleeping, eating, sightseeing with children that can be potentially problematic.\u201d She provided this list of ways to make travel easier with children – minus the plane traveling tips.<\/span><\/p>\n